Ahhhh sleep paralysis is so fucking real and so fucking scary.
Twice this week! The downside to house sitting I guess. I haven’t had an sp spell in forever before this week. My heart is still racing. I don’t always have them with the strong impending doom feeling but oooh wee I did just now. Feel so anxious.
Just remember that sometimes, the way you think about a person isn’t the way they actually are.
Learn how to say “no.”
Cram that word inside your mouth,
the whole thing, make sure all of it
gets in there. Let it walk on your tongue.
Practice with it in the mirror, push it
out, make faces, learn to love the salt
and bitter of it. Teach it to perch on your lip,
buzz, collect pollen from your sugary gloss.
Make it swarm between your cheeks.
Then, when the days come (there will be
many) where he pushes too hard, speaks
too sweetly, when the hand at your thigh
draws a thump in your stomach, when
the bitch gremlin inside whispers ‘it’s not
worth the fight,’ says you can barter
for your worth tomorrow, when your ribs
shrink, when he unfurls his Almighty Smile,
when four come at you at once, when
you love someone else, when the bar
is closing and your name becomes ‘Take
What I Can Get,’ when the girls hate you
anyway, when you want him until the burn
if only he wore a different face—
pull back your lips, bare the teeth you have
sharpened to their perfect points, flick
your stinger tongue, set free your swarm.
want to fix you
or fuck you
I can’t be fixed
and I don’t care to be saved
I haven’t listened, really listened (as in just focused on this), in awhile. That’s my fault. I didn’t keep up with it.
Can’t forget what this song means for me. Cannot forget. Too much danger in forgetting.
I am highly suspicious of the general media’s obsession with Lupita
They found themselves a dark-skinned darling to fawn over.
Their “Black friend”